Wishes

Today I wanted to write about something so dear to my heart, a desire I feel so strongly right now. But as I started typing I decided it was more precious than to just be thrown onto the internet. But this morning I have wish. I have a want that I would take over millions of dollars, a body that could be on the cover of a magazine, a beach house in the Bahamas. It's a wish that I push deep down most days because I can't hardly bear the thought of never having it. Today is one of my weaker or more sensitive days. But I'm so full of this hunger right now and I had to let a little out, try to release the squeezing of my heart. And so I will find ways to keep myself busy.

Today staying busy will be easy. I have much to look forward to. Tonight my dear sister and her family are coming over. And my dear cousin and her family are coming over. Not only will they be here to see Grams and to just enjoy each others' company, but we are also going to get to celebrate Kaidance's birthday! So I'm going to sneak around and see if I can find some balloons and streamers or something. Maybe this will help fill the void today.

Already having senior moments

I'm pretty good at remembering where I put things. If I happen to lose something like my keys or my phone I can find them within a couple of minutes by checking 3 or 4 places that they have to be. However, I have been racking my brains (which are sparse anyway) because I know I've started a blog here before yet I can't remember what on earth my login would have been. Now this might be a common occurance, but I'm a Virgo. In fact, I'm a Virgo that embraces a lot about being a Virgo - mainly being organized and analytical. This means that I have folders and sub folders galore that can tell me anything I want to know, such as logins, lists, even all the old myspace layouts I've used. That's how lame and organized I can be! So why is it that I have no idea where I put that silly old blog from years ago. I don't know. I guess it didn't say anything to clever or interesting. I suppose this is even more ironic to me because my most favorite animal is the elephant. Elephants never forget. I feel like I've let the creatures down. Maybe it bugs me because I lost a piece of myself, something I had created. Maybe it bugs me because I know it's just floating around out there without a purpose. Maybe it bugs me because I know it's just taking up space and wasting a megabite on some nameless server in some annoying building. Anyway, the point is, this is a new beginning. Farewell to my old missing blog and hello my new possibilities. I wonder if it's with that yin yang ring I lost all those years ago.